[22F] Found someone on Tinder, nervous about follow-through
Last time I posted that I was ready to put myself out there. I started aggressively swiping through Tinder after a stroke of courage. It was actually more difficult than I thought – you’d think that “22 y.o small first-time Asian seeks dick” would immediately be smothered in sausage but a lot of messages I got were kinda aggressive and my biggest fear was that I would meet with a guy who wouldn’t listen to me and would make me feel unsafe.
I finally matched with a cute guy who seems nice enough from the Snapchats I’ve been messaging, and we agreed to Netflix and chill in a couple days. But I’m still suuuuuuuuuper nervous. I have bad anxiety so I’m worried it will get the best of me, and I’m just nervous in general I guess. I’ll probably take a shot or two before I head over just to calm my nerves, but I’m wondering what I should do/advice from y’all about my first time. If y’all have any stories or advice that would be fantastic~
talkinboutfuckin: Tell him that you’re really nervous. If he’s nice, he’ll try to make you comfortable.
knowitallz: Meet him in a public place first … Make sure you are meeting someone normal enough to take to a private place…
is-hindsight20-20: Share your location with a trusted family member or friend, whenever I am meeting a guy for the first time I tell my sister. Pls seriously, be safe.
johnnywhoohaa: Meet somewhere public , that way your safe . You don’t wanna go to someone’s house you don’t even know .
VQ31A: Meet them in person first! Not only is it safer, but you’ll also be able to tell whether you actually vibe with the guy. Maybe find a bar near his place? That way you can meet in public and get that drink to calm your nerves.
Let him know you’re nervous/inexperienced/a virgin/etc. Try to relax! It’s easier said that done, I know, but if you’re anticipating pain, you’ll be tense and it’ll hurt like a bitch.
0perose: I met with a girl on line. We’re met near her apartment with the pretext of no sex. We hit it off and an hour later were at her apartment having sex. Sometimes that takes away the expectation and the feeling of stress towards it.
galpal_: Agree with everyone saying to meet in a public place first, don’t just go straight to his house without having met with him in real life!! (Well you can but for safety’s sake, pls don’t) Also, like others said, let a safety person know the address, and send them a text prior to going and after you go to his house so they know you’re safe.
jazmanimal6: Don’t Netflix and chill before you’ve already met! I’ve heard horror stories! I insist on a dive bar just for drinks for first date. From there you can determine whether you want to “extend” your date or go on another one! Also if you say “let’s just meet at a dive for drinks” it takes pressure off to overdress, and pressure off to awkwardly converse. If it’s awkward, you aren’t trapped for dinner or whatever.
lemondrop0821: Met my fiance through okcupid! We just had a little girl 7 weeks ago, and have been planning our wedding for over a year. Meeting online can be a blessing!
cuttlefish93: I did this a couple months ago. I was also nervous, but the horniness won. Doing a shot first was good – then just act confident and you’ll feel confident. After making out with him for a bit I was feeling iffy. I paused things so we could talk and get to know each other a little. Then we started massaging each other and I was feeling into it again… things went quite well after that! Take it slow and don’t do anything you don’t want to do!
BEZthePEZ: Bring some mace and just fuck him up if he tries to pull any of that bullshit