Does anybody else get [turned on] when your SO tells you about their past sexual encounters and history?
Lb610: Yeah but only if they spare specific names, otherwise I overthink it
amplified_cactus: It doesn’t turn me on. I find her stories amusing usually, and it’s always interesting to learn about her past.
n0mad26: It’s like a bitter excitement, so she doesn’t do it very often
Gf talks too much about past
I recently started dating this girl at work and we have made it exclusive. She always seemed like an open person but it makes me uncomfortable how much she brings up her past hookups and exs. At least once a week, her sexual history comes up out of nowhere.
For instance, I asked her where her and a friend met, and she said “Well I was hooking up with this guy and ended up hanging out with his friend, who I dated for a week, and now that guy’s sister and I are really good friends.”
Another thing she mentioned was how she had a threesome with a guy and a girl she dated, saying that “The guy didnt last very long so the girl and I had sex for an another hour.” She mentioned this out of nowhere while we were drinking with her brothers, trying to show her brothers up that she could get better women than they do
I have told her that it bothers me how much she non-nonchalantly brings up her past, especially around her friends. I ask her why she does this and she just answers, “I dont know why I do it.” Is she trying to impress me? Can someone please explain this?
Scoots1919: It would bother me too, but I think you have two options.
Ask her to stop or change her behaviour.
Or, stop letting it bother you.
There is nothing wrong with her behaviour, I think it’s understandable it annoys you, but it’s probably easier to change yourself then change her.
CakeMeHome: I could understand how that makes you uncomfortable. That would bother me too. It sounds like she always needs to prove something (that she’s attractive enough to have plenty of sex partners). Maybe this stems from some kind of insecurity. I find it odd she talks about threesomes in front of her brothers.
I guess at the end of the day you need to decide exactly how much it bothers you. Whether it’s something she can change, or something you no longer want to deal with.
TerminalCuteness: Sounds like you’re insecure and that is the reason it bothers you.
21stcenturyschizoidf: How old are you two? My (23F) boyfriend (27M) has never had a problem with it, but it could be a personality thing. Of course you can ask her to stop bringing it up, but she obviously feels that it’s not a big deal and its up to you to decide if you like that or not.
She could be able to monitor herself around you, but why should she?
purple-raven-lady: Tell her that it makes you uncomfortable
n0mad26: the part that struck me in your explanation was that it’s in front of her friends. She’s probably always been this way with them and it is what it is. If it was in front of your friends you have a case, but you can’t make her act differently in front of her friends
justahoustonpervert: I’ve always found it hot when my wife talked about her past and her mine.
we’re all going to have a sexual past, so that pay you need to get used to it, but her bringing it up, that is something she needs to be mindful of.
casino_night: This is a you problem. She just wants to be open and feel connected to you. Most girls have hooked up a lot and done some crazy shit. You’re just gonna have to learn to deal.