Women, what’s your most cringeworthy sex story with someone who was bad in bed? And did/how did you end up telling them they were terrible?
ireasearch: My fwb had some strange ideas about sex. He thought I got off giving him a blow job. He thought a woman orgasms when the man does.
I wrote him an email. It was ignored. I texted him. It got no response. I told him that if there was going to be any future for us the sex would have to improve… and it has. I stopped being gentle about what I want. I showed him how I masturbate, I stopped being as giving with the bj’s and I now expect him to at least try to get me off. It is working.
Lush622: I’m gonna buck the trend: the worst sex I’ve ever had was with a dude who was huge. He seemed to be under the assumption that sex is basically a re-enactment of porn?? Barely any foreplay, barely any talking, pretty much just stuck me in missionary, pushed his way in (I was not aroused at all, it HURT) and pumped like twice, came, and 20 mins later tried to do it again. I left.
He kept messaging me after until I just told him to knock it off, he probably still thinks he showed me a good time. Hope he was better for his next partner ¯_(ツ)_/¯
elleliz12: Granted, this is not the worst story ever in the history of sex, I’m sure people have worse. But :
I had a guy that grabbed my head and tried to shove his dick down my throat. Apparently that was supposed to turn me on? I kept moving my head back but he kept pushing down. It pissed me off and I stopped giving him a BJ.
Then he proceeded to rub my clit really hard. He thought the harder he rubbed = the better it felt. It was actually pretty painful. Like relax the clit is not a DJ booth.
He ended up not even being able to get hard so I just told him that we should probably just stop and try again later. Later never came because I peaced out of there. I did not tell him how bad he was.
TinyCynner: Definitely not the worst here, but my BF couldn’t find my vagina for somewhere around 4-6 months after we started having “sex.” He’d fumble around, poke near-ish the entrance with his dick, and then just kinda hump my butt crack for a bit. Or, sometimes, he’d penetrate me and then slip out and hump my butt crack, again without noticing any difference.
So… I didn’t say anything for a long time. He couldn’t really get hard as it was. He had super bad performance anxiety, and it’s awkward enough to have to do the “It’s okay you didn’t get hard” speech on a regular basis. He wouldn’t let me touch him, either. After some time, I started dropping some hints, telling him he was “too far south.” He’d be trying to penetrate me, and I’d tell him “You need to head north. Okay, that’s too far.” Then, I got more explicit.
We had a bunch of other issues going on at the time. I wasn’t great at communicating, he was worse, but eventually we got to the point where I could go down on him, he could *finally* get erect with my help, and I could be the one to guide penetration because *I* at least know where my vagina is. Now, we kinda laugh and cringe at how terrible we were. I mean, it’s not all on him. He’s the only guy I’ve ever had sex with, and theoretically he was supposed to be the “experienced” one (by which I mean he maybe had sex once, although he kinda doubts that now considering he couldn’t tell he wasn’t actually fucking me).
whineforwine: Had sex with a guy with LITERALLY a 2 inch dick. He insisted that I had to do everything. Was so fed up that I got it over with, left, and haven’t talked to him since.
Another guy finished in like 20 seconds. What’s worse is that he didn’t even do foreplay or even try to please me, just slapped it in there went to town and after he finished he pulled out rolled over and fell asleep. Never answered his texts after that….
BlackTemplar2154: I’m genuinely here to only read responses and feel better about myself.
I’m kind of a piece of shit.
Fajitasoup: He couldn’t stay hard and moaned loudly like a woman.I like a noisy man but I mean whimpering and high pitched feminine moaning. Like a porn. I actually feel bad about it because I laughed involuntarily and tried to make it into a playful laugh but he knew 🙁
sinead-orebellion: It was a random hookup with someone I kinda knew.) (From church of all places).
Ended up being a one off. Obviously.
It started ok.
The kissing was passable.
A bit awkward but that was to be expected.
He went down on me, which was actually not bad. Apart from he stopped when I was pretty close to cumming, and no I don’t believe he thought I had cum.
So I was on the edge of orgasm and then bam. Over.
We then get to the fucking.
He was…. silent.
Like I’ve shagged some guys who are quiet.
He. Was. Silent!!!
It was so bloody creepy.
It put me off any and all pleasure.
It disturbed me.
He was going at it.
But….. not even a groan or heavy breathing.
So I was fully faking it. Trying to get this over with, while an internal dialog of “how is he so quiet, like *listen careful* nope, nothing…. what the fuck is this…. maybe if I do this it will improve this…. nope…. nothing”
It didn’t take him that long to cum.
And… he is now referred to as “silent guy”
sexybloodclot: He started fucking the crease between my vagina and leg and asked me if “I liked his big cock”. I just got on top of him.
praxiis: The worst sex I ever happened to be with one of the hottest guys I’d ever seen. I never realized that a man could also be a “dead fish” in bed, but yeah, this guy was it.
He barely touched me. We kissed, but he didn’t put his hands on my body at all for the entire experience. Foreplay consisted of a bit of kissing and then him lying on his back while I did things to him – kissing, touching, sucked his dick a bit.
I figured maybe he just needed to be turned on more and then he’d start being more active… nope. Just lying there followed by robotic humping. Which didn’t feel very good considering the total lack of sensuality, touching, and clitoral stimulation to warm me up.
olivejew0322: This guy spent basically zero time initiating sex, frantically humped and pumped with his little dick for all of 3 minutes and was GLOWING after. I literally locked myself in the bathroom and stared at myself in the mirror questioning my existence until he knocked and asked if I was ok. I was 17 and that was when I started to learn to be more selective with my sexual partners
Karnaf0: My ex decided to finger me while making out, sounds good, right? For a couple of moments I thought he’s just not in the right position or something, but after 5 mins of terrible (painful) attempts to just finger me correctly, I told him to stop. At first he thought I’m jk, so I was more aggressive and pulled his hand out to find it covered in blood (was not on my period for sure!). On the spot I told him that this never gonna happen again.
MemberKablaam: Guy had a thin 3 inch penis and refused to use a toy on me. I can’t help my deep spots are the most sensitive, but this guy absolutely refused to compensate. I just layed there until it was over and never called him back.
sinead-orebellion: I also had a fwb with a guy who I chatted to via badoo.
He was ten years older.
Talked a big game.
The things he had experienced. Etc.
It was kinda hot the first face to face was him telling me he was going to knock on my door on the way past to go to work. I wasn’t to speak. We would kiss, he would carry on. He had me pushed against the wall kissing me. Gave me an aporoval type eye up and a wee nod before he left.
But…. fast forward to hooking up.
He was a really nice guy.
Loved chatting to him, he was affectionate, lots of touch etc.
Discovered the smallest penis I’ve encountered.
A bit like my thumb, but slightly thicker.
Sex just didn’t work (and I questioned his stories all of a sudden).
But he gave semi-decent head and the touch, company was nice.
So we hooked up 6-8 times.
So I would return the favour orally.
But, my God he just took forever to cum.
It was an ordeal and he would need to jerk himself off a bit until he was about to cum then I would finish the bj (his excuse was he masturbated too often and now it takes too long).
But it really just didn’t mesh.
His *experiences* with my experience of him.
22Livia: Telling? No, what for.
PerfectChaos33: Oh gosh where to begin? Do you want just one story? Cause I’ve got a few..
1. M, we’ll call him. Met him off tinder for dinner. About a week later we decided to get a hotel room, I offered to put it on my card and agreed he’d give me cash. Well the sex was absolutely terrible. He refused to go down on me, I got about 45 seconds of fingering before he wanted to fuck. He was a total jackhammer. It was so bad. *thrust 3x* *change position* *thrust 3x* *change position*
Oh but wait, there’s more! He decided, on his own accord, that he wanted to do anal. No talk about this, no warning, *nothing* he legit just pulled out then tried to shove his dick up my ass. “What are you doing?” “Oh sorry” he says then goes back to the jackhammer. But he tries again. I tell him to stop. He says “no, you’ll like it” uh fuck you, no.
2. We’ll call him S. I was friends with him for like a year before we randomly hooked up. Turns out I took his virginity. The sex was terrible. He was so nervous, he wouldn’t even touch me. And because of how nervous he was, *I* had to be on top the whole time. Now don’t get me wrong, I love being on top, but not for 45 minutes! My legs felt like they were gonna fall off! He could barely stay hard, and I’m more understanding of that but that just added to how terrible the sex was.
3. He’s a total douche so we’re not even gonna give him a nickname, Jordan. Met him at a party, we talked a bunch and he invited me back to his place. Except he failed to tell me he lived in a dorm room. And had a roommate. Whose bed was 3 feet away. He went on about how much he’ll go down on me, etc etc. That was mediocre and lasted like 3 minutes. Then it was “his turn” dude your itty bitty pencil dick was nasty. Then he insisted I play with his balls. Bro, balls are weird as fuck. Finally I got out of blowing him and started riding him. Could barely feel his dick. But the worst part was he was a total starfish. Just laid there and stared at the ceiling.
Totally ghosted him after that. Like 4 months later, turns out he’s friends with my new FWB. Upon seeing me walk into the apartment and go straight into FWB’s room, I heard him tell everyone else how FWB was getting his sloppy seconds. I shut that shit down with “I don’t think it counts as sloppy seconds if I couldn’t feel your dick in the first place”
His smile dropped, while everyone else started grinning ear to ear. Just ran into him again at a party a couple weeks ago, he was acting like he didn’t know me. Yeah right, nobody would forget such a severe burn
OfficialFrenchToast_: It was some guy I met off OkCupid a year ago. He ended up being a lot more obese in person than his photos portrayed, and before we met he talked a big game about how big his dick it was. He whipped it out, and…it couldn’t have been bigger than three or four inches at most. I can only cum from deep penetration so I already knew I was in for an unsatisfying evening but I went for it anyways, and it was just terrible. He had absolutely no rhythm, it was like a fish flopping against me. His dick kept popping out because he could barely keep a boner with a condom on. By some miracle of nature he came, and where did he cum? All over my face, which I enjoy doing with a boyfriend but *not* some internet rando. I kicked him out and didn’t contact him again.
Oh, and his ass smelled like he hadn’t showered for a week.
RKK8: Him rubbing my clit hard, him pushing my head on his dick while giving him a BJ (without consent) & no foreplay.
People who aren’t present, and just in it for themselves.. goddamnit.
Orangecabbage: It’s crazy how many women just ghost the dude without giving them a reason. I understand you’re under no obligation to tell them why you’re done with them, but it would be a nice thing to do.
knowitallz: I am guy, I will add my story at being a terrible lay. Why not! it’s a funny story.
I was married and just got into open relationship. There was this woman in our party friends group and I finally was given permission by the wife to go hookup with someone else.
Now it had been years since I had sex with someone else so I was nervous as fuck. We have an awkward make out. I move along and try to play with her and finger her and she moves too excited for what I am doing to her. She is almost cumming from just touching her lady parts. This is super intimidating since its usually not something that happens when you just finger a girl. But for her this is how it was.
We eventually get to sex. But as soon as I stick it in she is grabbing me, moaning like a wild banshee and practically cumming from just the initial penetration. This is freaking me out. I keep going but her over reaction to my shitty performance is really throwing me off and getting I to my head. And everyone knows when you get in your head that you start to lose you hard on. So that is what happened. I lost it. Soon after I left and have never contacted her again. I am sure she was disappointed. I was really weirded out