I feel hideous
This is probably weird, and I’m kinda embarrassed talking about it, but are injured or damaged people still attractive?
I was in a car accident when I was 12(I’m 19F now) and I have some scarring on my neck and shoulder, as well as having both legs amputated mid thigh. I went through a long period of depression and suicidal shit and I’m coming out on the better end of it now, but no one seems to ever be interested in me and most apart from my close friends don’t want to get close.
Long story short, I kinda just feel broken and hideous. Am I missing something or are people just not interested in me because I’m not ‘normal’?
Koldcutter: I imagine guys are interested but just feel like you or others could view their interest as being a kink of sorts. Unfortunately the world judges which puts you in a position of having to try much harder.
wickedseraph: The kind of person who will refuse to look at you because of an injury are the kind of people you wouldn’t want to be with, anyways.
Nineteen is still young, friend. I didn’t have a serious partner until I was in my 20s. It seems like your self-confidence is very, very low. I would gently encourage you to focus on building up your esteem, and perhaps speak with a therapist, instead of letting yourself feel disappointed because you haven’t had a partner yet.
I am of the very, very firm belief that there is a lid for every pot. You’re not broken – you just haven’t found your lid yet.
charrison9313: Sounds like you’re perfectly normal and just got delt a bad hand. As for how you look, the scarring and such wouldn’t bother me at all, but the each his own. I guess folks feel uncomfortable maybe? Like they’re more worried they might slip up and say something that might upset you.
barefootone: Hi! First of all, that was obviously a life full of challenge up until now. You are obviously a strong person.
I’ll give you my totally honest, unfiltered answer.
I would be afraid of knowing what to say or what to do or even to know if you were capable of having relationships (physically as well as emotionally). So there would be an excuse to get to know you better and then also signal from you that it was okay to talk about these things. Is probably wait for you to open up rather than fear offending you.
Assuming that happened, and you had a great personality, I could totally see myself with someone of your physical description. Attraction is about so much more than physical qualities. They okay a role but they are an enhancement. Someone who is easy to be around, is funny, is willing to be vulnerable and have good conversations, is open minded and non judgemental etc would be what would be most important to me.
Obviously there are logistical challenges to your life so it’s not all just about attraction and compatibility – there would presumably be other things to work out like where to meet people and how independently you can get around etc, but you will find people who will love you for who you are. You may just need to put out the friendly and open signals to let people know it’s okay to get to know you.
Does that help in some tiny way?
cupsandmugs555: That’s really crappy, though when you meet the right person, they’ll think you’re beautiful 🙂
mwise003: Probably going to have to put yourself out there. Most people aren’t going to be able to understand/empathize with your disability. Most won’t see you as a sexual object, not because of the reasons you think. Probably more because they have so many other feelings when they interact with you.
Some will be nervous not to say something offensive or will view you as someone with more problems then trying to find companionship.
You may have to remind people that you’re still a young woman with needs, you still want that first kiss, to be loved, to be wanted sexually.
sumigaeshibjj: Also another factor is that I wouldn’t want to be assuming a role as a care taker. Like I wouldn’t be wheeling someone around or anything like that. In terms of assistance I would only offer the assistance that I would offer to a stranger on the street.
mickey021771: Do you have a pretty face ? Breasts ? If so some man will find you very attractive at some point…..you only need one man……
Do you have sensation in your clit and vagina ?
GA1200: An interesting ted talk I listened to a few years ago. Your problem is how to be confident when you feel the way you do.
dayintheplanes: The only people who will be turned off by that are people who are better off nowhere near any human life or those who are into feet.
Svengelskamannen: Yes people will still find you attractive. Check out normal nudes for a look at real human bodies. If you feel like it post yourself there too.