Playing the “dead fish” role on purpose…
Hello! Last night I (27F) experienced something I never have before.
I’ve been sexually active since I was 14 (about 30+ partners at this point), but my most satisfying sexual relationship has been the one with my current partner of 3 years. We never stick with the same thing, kind of subconsciously scroll through the wheel of sexual roles. Sometimes it’s “scary Dom and subservient slave”, or “Daddy and little girl”, or even regular sex in the heat of the moment. I absolutely love it.
I’ve always, always been extremely expressive and reactive during a good time. Lots of noise, lots of squirming, gripping, scratching. I’m just extremely honest with my body when I’m getting it on. But last night, my partner started kissing me, and with the gentlest Dom voice I’ve ever heard, he said “Don’t react”.
Now, this was probably the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I couldn’t kiss back, I couldn’t rake my nails down his back, I could throw my legs around him. Every time I did, he’d stop and gently tell me to reel in my control, and wouldn’t continue until I managed to.
This was SO FUCKING HOT. I could feel everything way stronger. This was different than being tied up, where I could still react and struggle against my bindings if I wanted to. This was about mental control and I came 2x as much as I usually do. Finally as he was about to finish, he told me I could let go. The mother of all orgasms rolled over the edge at the release of all of tension I’d been holding trying to control my body’s reactions.
After we were laying in the afterglow, we both talked in detail about that kind of mental space, both of our sides of it. I felt… In control, and safe, and attended to. I have a history of sexual abuse and assault, so for me to establish my own control in this new space, was profound.
Now for my question: Does anyone have any experience with this? How can we evolve this into something more?
Hass7771: This was pretty nice to read
Loftymattress: Yess! My husband and I do a little play off this. I pretend I’m sleeping, and he gently has his way with me. If I move around, he shushes me gently, like he’s afraid to wake me. He’ll stand next to me on the bed, and drag his cock up and down my body, and place it sweetly on my lips. Usually the fantasy ends with him masturbating onto me. Then he “wakes me up” and then gives me oral till I get mine.
It is a delicious exercise in self control!
kjthedad: Nothing quite like this, but I have had a guy who really turned me on to the concept of sensory deprivation.
He tied my hands and feet so I couldn’t touch him, put headphones on me with In This Moment blasting so I couldn’t hear him, and a blindfold so I couldn’t see him.
If you haven’t tried it, I HIGHLY recommend it. The anticipation of what’s going to happen is probably the best parts. Everything is heightened. Every little touch sent tingles all over me and I swear every orgasm was on a cosmic level.
NotCoder: I wanna try this now omg
PenguinSailboat: i want this :’)
missed_againn: Oh wow I can’t wait to try this!! Thank you!!
A-kitkit: aww this is sweet, But id recommend for you and your partner not to do this too often. I feel like the newness and the sexiness will then go away. My advice is to keep this a special thing between you two, try this only once a month and/or when theres something to celebrate!
Akoiyei: Isnt it a bit like edging? Start and stop when ever you get close or rather in your case moving, it could evolve in to the use of sensory deprivation that could be fun if your ok with certain or all senses being taken away from u. You will have to work on a hand gesture to signal if u want it to stop though maybe holding and then dropping a small ball if it becomes too much
PrismaticCat2000: I do this to myself rarely when masturbating. Hard to do but holy cow do I cum hard.
10/10 would recommend.