Observations on the [variety] of the [vagina]
tl;dr – Male shares his experience on the different sensations he feels on his penis from variations in the vagina during intercourse. The sensations vary with position, partner, and time during the female’s cycle.
First, about me. I’m a male in his late thirties and have had about 40 partners, often several regularly. My penis is just under 8 inches in length and thicker than average. Many of the females I’ve been with have considered me to be very well-endowed – a nice ego-stroke indeed, but my girth has caused me more problems than good. But that’s a topic for another post.
Vaginas and their variations are interesting. With a penis, you can see it and probably develop an idea of what it will feel like during sex. That is not the case with a vagina; you never know what you’re going to get, and you don’t know until you’re inside.
First, as I am sure most can relate to, position causes a difference in sensations during sex. For me, the difference in feeling between positons is not that significant. Different positions are more about the view, what you can do with your hands, being face to face or not, how much of a workout you want, etc.
We all know the movie that compared the sensation of a vagina on the penis as a “warm apple pie.” A warm apple pie would feel like squishy, moist warmth touching everything at the same time, but without pressure. Some vaginas do indeed feel that way. Simply put, these vaginas are warm, moist, and squishy, but do not exert significant pressure on the penis. I personally enjoy this type of vagina very much. It’s not a “tight” feeling and there is no significant friction on the penis – it’s just an overall pleasant sensation. It’s somewhat comparable to anal, which feels like thrusting into an empty void. With these sort of vaginas I am more inclined to thrust hard, deep and fast to make up for the lack of pressure, and am able to do so without worry of causing my partner discomfort. That certainly adds to the experience. Sometimes it can take me longer to finish, because there’s not as much friction – certainly not a bad thing. Thrusting at an angle can sometimes increase sensation and friction, or placing a toy in her ass can make it feel a bit tighter. Overall these sort of vaginas are very enjoyable. I’ve never been with a girl who was “too loose” and I don’t think that really exists.
In contrast, some vaginas feel literally like a tube – a perfectly circular tunnel that resists expansion and exerts equal pressure everywhere. These are what most would call a “tight” vagina. There is significant friction. Extra lubrication is sometimes required from the beginning. If things start to dry out, I’ll be sore or even chaffed the next day. I am inclined to thrust much more slowly and gently, to prevent soreness, chaffing, and hurting my partner. The feeling of pressure all around the penis is very nice. One partner in particular with a vagina like this would squeeze gently at the end of each thrust, placing a vice-like grip around my penis, which added to the experience. She could squeeze so hard that it would push me out or prevent me from penetrating. Some positions don’t work well with this sort of vagina. For example, I’ve found that girl-on-top positions can be difficult, because if the penis slips out, it has to be exactly at the entrance for it to go back in. Forceful thrusts can be dangerous, as there’s not much room for error. Also, some positions tend to curve the vagina in a certain direction (for example, if the girl is sitting at the edge of a desk or counter), and can make thrusting a challenge or even uncomfortable as a very erect penis isn’t inclined to want to curve to follow a very tight vagina.
Some vaginas feel smooth and some have ripples. There’s no correlation with how tight a vagina is here. In some, I can literally feel the ripples and countours of the vagina on my penis. While this may sound nice, strangely it really doesn’t offer any added pleasure. In contrast, some vaginas feel very smooth inside – silky smooth.
Depth is also a major consideration. With one partner, in the right positions I could just barely reach her cervix with the tip of my penis, and she absolutely loved it and would cum quickly from repeated deep thrusts that bumped it. With several partners, I’ve not been able to thrust fully and going deep would cause my partner severe pain, as I’d hit her cervix. While I still enjoyed sex with those partners, it was not ideal. The majority of my partners have been able to accomodate my penis fully, although in some, I suspect my penis would slip around the cervix into the fornix, as I could easily find it with my fingers and my penis is longer than my longest finger!
I have noticed that with some long-term partners, their vaginas are most tight a few days after their period ends, and the loosest just before their period.
When it comes to tightness or depth, there is no correlation between the size of a girl and her vagina. I’ve had some very petite partners with “apple pie” vaginas that felt bottomless and could accomodate me with ease. Yet I had a very tall partner (height of six feet) that whose cervix I could hit easily.
Is there a perfect vagina? For me, I’d say perfect would be deep enough to accommodate my entire penis, tight enough to exert some friction on my penis, but not so tight where extra lubrication was required, or where I have to worry about chafing or injury in certain positions.
finmeister: I don’t think this is a brag at all. You simply seem like a curious and aware type of person.
As a woman I’ve often wondered what a man feels during sex. I’ve even asked my guy and he’s said something similar to you.
He’s perfectly average sized, 5 1/2″. He would like to be bigger but I LOVE his penis size. Seriously. I’m a small lady and honestly, OP, you would probably be much too big for me. I’m one that likens having my cervix hit to what men say they feel when they’re kicked in the balls. And with longer men, that happens to often and I’m always dreading that it might. My last partner before my current was too thick.
But just like men have different preferences so do women. Plenty of people would think men like you and my ex are perfect and my current guy is too small. People talk about sex a lot. What they did and what they would like to do, but most people don’t talk about the varying mechanics and experiences, and how they relate to your own preferences. So that’s why I like your post. For example so many men want “as tight as possible” while you prefer softer/looser.
My current guy offered some perspective and what he said was also interesting. Our situation is a bit unique, too, in that while we don’t know each other’s “number” and don’t want to, we have a rough guess. I’ve had around 12 partners, and going by what he’s told me about exes and such, he’s had somewhere around 5. I’m 40, he’s 44 in a few days.
What’s unique is that I am the only partner he’s had who has never had a child. All his past partners had had children (not his children), altho by the time he was with them, it was a year or more after the birth. So he doesn’t have a before and after comparison.
Prior to him my last partner was 2 years ago.
He said the first time I was almost too tight. Like what you describe, not quite chafing but too much friction. Too intense and not in an entirely good way. I was quite nervous (because of some events in my sexual past) so I may have been clenching and not aware of it, and I do know that “if you don’t use it you lose it” is a thing. I’ve gone long stretches without sex before, and the first few times there’s always some soreness for me and even sometimes light bleeding. The *vagina* doesn’t tighten up again, perse, and you don’t revirginize, but the muscles of the vaginal wall and the pelvic floor do get out of practice, so to speak. It’s like my body “forgets” how to accept a penis. We went slow and used a fucking ton of lube, and the sex was good for both of us, but we both agree there were also logistic issues.
He says he can feel the ridges and curves in my vagina and that it doesn’t add or detract from pleasure, it makes it feel more “personal” to him. Like “this is a real, individual person, this is her unique body that I’m experiencing with my own, no one else will feel quite like this”. Which I think is a really awesome way to look at and appreciate sex. Even if it’s casual. You will never have that exact experience with anyone else.
As I mentioned each of his past partners were mothers and while he doesn’t have a before and after with them, he says I feel “firmer”. Not necessarily tighter or looser, better or worse, he said like the difference between a rubber band and a bungee cord like you’d use to tie your car trunk closed. Same thing, same material, just a bit different.
I would disagree that you know what a penis will feel like just by touching or looking at it. Everyone moves differently, everyone moves differently *together* and sometimes differently at different times, and a dick is not a dick is not a dick.
For example my guy is average sized and his penis doesn’t curve at all. But, somehow he manages to rub against my G spot in any position without trying and it’s amazing. I cum so fast with him, and I’ve been with other similarly sized and shaped guys where it felt totally different and I couldn’t cum at all, or rarely.
He’s also more sensitive in the shaft of his penis than the head. So he doesn’t generally take long strokes (which I prefer) and I can ride him without totally wearing my thighs out. Sometimes just rocking is enough for both of us.
Again, I’ve had similarly sized guys who were sensitive in different places and ways, and who preferred to move entirely differently than my current guy, and liked to be touched in entirely different ways.
Of course sometimes we’re in the mood for harder, faster, rougher sex, and other times slower and gentler, but that’s most people.
I think most people are curious as to what the other person feels (at least in PIV sex). Because if I bite your shoulder, you’ll know that I feel something similar when you bite mine because we both have a shoulder. We may not *enjoy* the same things, but we can have a comparable enough experience to know what the other is probably feeling. Sex isn’t that way, because in PIV, I can’t put a sensitive part of my body inside another persons. I don’t have the parts so I have no frame of reference so I am always curious how the other half lives lol.
ShortBrownAndUgly: can you comment on flavors
fromThe70s: I posted this because I thought some might find it interesting. Especially women.
Littlemissfunshines: Thank you so MUCH for posting this. Contrary to what some others have said, I find it fascinating, because men rarely describe the vagina in a way that accounts for the huge variety in sizes, texture, etc.
rmirandaa: Quite interesting, I like how it sounds like a scholarly article.
Panne91: Thank you for posting this, it’s very interesting to read:)
NaughtyMommy82: Curious about observations on tastes. Wonder what makes one taste different or better than another? Thoughts?
TheFountainW: This was interesting, thanks 🙂
My grilfriend is very tight and positions where she is on her back and I’m upright are always a problem (like her legs on my shoulders). I think this fits to your description
chistopherpoole: Have you noticed a correlation between the lengh of the clitoris and the depth of the vagina?
Chrissmith98x: Why would you post this?
poppystmichelle: Interesting post! I’ve had a child, but I think mine is pretty tight because sometimes we have a hard time getting it in; sometimes it takes a little grinding to get it in all the way. My partner seems about average size.
I’m not sure about my texture. I’ve heard the inside of the vagina has ridges like the roof of your mouth. Also, that they smooth over time. I’m in my 40s, so I imagine mine has become more smooth, although I put a finger in and it wasn’t smooth at all. I am curious about what I feel like.
nottylilpearl: This is very informative. Thanks for posting!
Shygrrl12: Interesting, I wonder, does weight/body type play a factor in how the vagina feels? Like, would partners with wider hips have a general feel or is everything completely independent. (I also wonder how racial background play a role but that feels a little too risque to ask)
admiral_snugglebutt: Hitting the cervix isn’t always about depth, it’s about angles. My cervix is about an inch in to the vagina, and then all the rest of the vagina is past it. A bad angle will hit it wrong, but there’s pretty much no such thing as a partner who is small enough not to hit it. Bottoming out is not the same as hitting the cervix. A large partner will bottom out, a partner of any size could hit my cervix.
bb34r: Any thoughts on how it feels with women who have given birth vs women who have not?
slappytheclown: This is a man who loves the sound of his own voice
freakingout1415: I love the fact you need to brag about your penis size even though it has nothing to do with vaginas.