[32M] What are the positives of being an older male virgin?
So I’m 32 and I might be having sex for the first time soon with someone I’m talking to on Tinder and I’ve decided to take a gamble on being honest about being a virgin. She’s pretty smart and communication has been good so far which I think are pretty good signs that she might be ok with it. But I’m wondering, how can I sell it as a good thing?
I already have a few ideas, such as I’m a blank slate willing to do whatever she likes. If she’s self conscious at all, she doesn’t have any other partners to ‘compete’ with. Recent experience has taught me that I really like being playful and creative. Though I don’t have proof, I’ve been tested recently and everything came back negative.
If anyone has anything to add to the list I’m all ears
Sandmint: You don’t need to sell your virginity as a good thing. You don’t need to sell it as anything to her, but it sounds like you’re selling it to yourself.
If she’s into teaching, she has a blank slate to work with. If she’s insecure enough to think she needs to compete with a partner’s past, that’s a bigger problem on her end.
harrisoncock: Being a virgin doesnt matter, but if you lie about it, you might make it into something that matters
ltothentothes: This just happened to me, like within the past week happened to me, but he didn’t tell me until the day after. I wished he would have told me, only because I think it would have taken a lot of the pressure off of him and also because I would have kept it much more basic and taken charge a little more. It was his decision though, not necessarily my business, and I understood why he didn’t tell me. My advice would be to tell her, don’t try to sell it and no need to over explain unless she asks and you want to talk about it. Tell her you’re ready to learn if she wants to teach you a thing or two. Be receptive and open to feedback and you’ll be just fine.
dloex: Don’t tell her just sleep with her
acron5n5: Just don’t listen to those here who suggest you tell her about it and refrain from bringing this up. I almost guarantee you’ll have to start looking for someone else the moment you confess to be a virgin.
Some women and people in general say it doesn’t matter but they lie (likely to themselves), most girls are afraid to end up with a virgin, so if you wish you can proceed but mentioning (perhaps) the worst part about you doesn’t seem like a good strategy. Learn from what girls do – most of them if asked tell you they had a couple of sexual partners beforehand even be they 25 or 30 years old because they simply know most men don’t like women with huge partner history.
Mydral: Do not tell it to her over text!
If you want to tell her it has to be in person when you are talking about sex already.
Also if you don’t feel nervous don’t tell her at all. If you feel.nervous bring it up in conversation. Be prepared that she may ask you why. Please be also mentally prepared for negative reactions.
And don’t sell it. It’s just a fact, it’s not positive or negative. Hence it’s better to see her reaction in person when you talk about it.