So, my new sister is being a douche and recorded me during my private time
This is kinda emberassing honestly. My mom got married to my stepdad 2 years ago and I got along with his daughter pretty well and I never expected her to pull some shit like this. (She is 17 and I’m 16). We starting going to the same school and we even hang out. So, our rooms don’t have locks because our parents are very strict and they want to know what we are always doing. It was time when everyone was basically asleep and all the rooms are pretty far apart, like in 4 different corners of the house so I thought I wouldn’t get caught.
I started jerking off and my door was closed, I never even noticed her. I foumd out through a close mutual friend, apprently she showed our friend and then she approached me telling me that my sister showed her an explicit video of me. I was pretty mad and asked my sister why the fuck she did that. She said it was fine and not to worry that she wouldn’t send it out and that she only had the video for herself that she wouldn’t show anyone else. I asked her to delete it, and she said no.
I honestly don’t know what to do. If my mom finds out, she will kill me because I’m not allowed to masturbate, she said it is fucking disgusting
PermanentBrunch: Just tell your mom that your “sister” took a video of you naked and has been showing people, and that you are incredibly disturbed. That way you don’t have to admit to jerking off. Your family sounds really fucked up.
MammothMaximus: I don’t think this is the right sub for this but I’m going to respond either way.
Since you’re underage this footage of you is essentially child porn and your sister could land in some very very bad trouble if caught with it in her possession.
SolomonDarling: Threaten her that you’ll tell your parents if she doesn’t allow you to take her phone and delete it yourself.
What she’s doing is a serious crime, but it’s better to tell your parents than the police. At least for now.
Other than that, that’s the closest to a real life porno I’ve ever gotten.
EDIT: Don’t worry about your mom finding out you jerk off, she will definitely be too concerned about your step sister’s behavior to care. Also, she’s not stupid, chances are she already knows you masturbate – they always know.
dracoscha: There are so many levels of wrong in this I don’t even really know where to start. From a blatant violation of you privacy, to your mothers fucked up attitude towards sexuality.
But I in your position would probably start by reminding her that she is in possession of what is legally considered child pornography and even if she herself is underage she could face serious consequences if she doesn’t destroy the material imitatively. Alternatively or additionally I would talk to your stepdad (depending on your relationship) about the subject if you don’t feel comfortable talking to your mom. Because first: he will likely know what it is like being a 16 year old boy. And second: he is the one who has to take responsibility for his daughters behavior.
throwaway-cdn: “Hey sis, so let me make this perfectly clear, you are going to delete that video and any copies of it. We can do this the easy way, the hard way, or the harder way. You have produced, are in possession of, and have distributed child porn and are using it to blackmail. I won’t allow that to continue.
So the easy way is that you delete it with me watching, and we can try to put this behind us. Our little secret, you know.
The hard way is that I bring it up with our parents and get it out in the open. Knowing my moms feelings about sexuality it will make life hell for both of us for a while, but in the end it likely is a bandaid that needs to get ripped off.
The hardest way is for me to bypass our parents and inform the authorities. Trust me they won’t take kindly to this, it will likely rip our family apart and leave you with a permenant record. Is that what you want?
So how will it be? Sis?”
Odds are on her folding.
PM_ME_YOUR_URETHERA: Who the fuck tells a teen they can’t masturbate. That’s fucked up.
bilbosbeardedballs: First of all your mum is completely fucked in the head if she says no masturbating. It is perfectly natural and normal, especially for someone your age.
Secondly, your cunt of a sister has illegally produced child porn and if the police are notified they will come down on her like a ton of bricks. This is a very VERY serious crime, even more so of she distributed it to friends. She may very well end up on a sex offenders list for the rest of her life.
C00gar: Any doctor will tell you (and your mom) that masturbation is normal and healthy. Are you just supposed to walk around with blue balls until marriage? No. Your mom needs to get it through her head that it’s your body and your decision.
As for your sister, I’d tell her to hand over the video or you’re going to the police or guidance counselor. Also, a doctor can report this abuse too. And it is abuse.
browolf2: I’m not sure what’s worse – that your mom thinks masturbation is the worst thing ever or that your sister wants a video of you doing it for her own gratification.
baardvark: This is a form of sexual abuse. Don’t listen to the folks this thread who are more worried about your sister than about you. Repost this in /r/legaladvice
JakobWulfkind: It sounds like both of you are getting some fucked-up messages from your parents about sex, and given how much control they try to exert over your respective sexualities, I’d avoid involving them if at all possible — which also means not telling teachers, police, or social workers.
To address the recording, I’d enlist her friends first — ask them to tell her that what she did was fucked up and that she needs to delete it pronto. Then remind her that possession and distribution of child pornography is a serious crime and that the existence of the video puts her in serious danger, especially if it is somewhere online (since most cloud service TOS’s allow them to examine your files without permission, which they will absolutely do if they suspect that a user is concealing child pornography). Also try to figure out why she made the video — is she attracted to you and using it in lieu of online porn? Did she do it to humiliate you? Did someone else ask her for it? These will help you to protect yourself in the future in case she has a relapse of Shitty Awful Person Syndrome, and will help you to establish effective boundaries with her in the future; just don’t fall into the trap of thinking that any of the reasons she gives make this your fault — the only way you would be to blame here is if you either explicitly and freely consented to the video being taken, or else made it yourself and gave it to her.
Now, let’s talk about your parents — the fact that you’re more afraid of their reaction to someone sexually abusing you than you are of the abuse itself speaks volumes. You’ve already mentioned your mother and stepfather not giving you the right to privacy, your mother has said nasty things to you about masturbation, and has shamed you for showing interest in the opposite sex — this is honestly even creepier than what your sister did, and I’m a little worried for your safety here. Has your mother ever hurt you, or threatened to, because of your sexuality? Does she force you to leave your door open while you are dressing or undressing, or when you are bathing or using the bathroom? Does she deliberately embarrass you in front of others? Does she force you to hurt yourself, or say cruel things about yourself? If the answer to any of these questions is “yes”, you need to find a social worker, school counselor, or police officer and tell them what you’re experiencing.
03throwaway03: You have ALL the power in this situation.
Whether or not you go to your mom or your sister, (or stepdad but I don’t think that was on your radar), you can basically say “You/my sister is committing a serious felony that with one phone call I can destroy your/her life forever, and be 100% in the right. Get rid of it, or I will make the call.”
kam62: You Are 16, Masturbation is normal, if your mom lays down that kind of rule it’s because she has her own personal problems. Or she knows it’s inevitable and shaming you is her way of curtailing your activities. THINK ABOUT IT, if your sister showed your mom, I would hope the first question would be ” how long ago was this, what are you doing with it and what were you thinking recording it!'” She is torturing you over something she would get in more trouble for doing than you. Call her bluff, tell her erase it or YOU are telling mom she has inappropriate stuff of you on her phone! Keep yourself private, and carry on.
grishmoney929: Wonder how many videos she has of your parents.
PInkNinjaCow: I haven’t seen this advice yet, so I’m going to throw it down. When I was a kid, younger than you, I had classmates sexually assaulting me every day after lunch. I was shy and had no idea what to do. I finally approached a teacher that I trusted. I told her I was embarrassed and didn’t know where to turn and asked if she could help me. And she did.
I would recommend going to a male teacher at school that you love and tell him everything. I say male because they understand more about boys and their need to master bate 24/7 (at least that’s what my husband says) let him handle the police. And ask him to handle it quick as new idiot sis is showing people. You aren’t comfortable telling mom for fear of getting in trouble.
And I am so sorry you’re going through this!!
kallisti_gold: Call the cops.
Dead serious, that’s hella illegal. Creating and distributing child pornography.
Don’t worry about mom, she’ll be more upset about the felony than you touching yourself.
was-not-me: I think she wants to bang.
SpareMoral: Just tell her, she has recorded child porn.
ancon: Tell your parents your sister is distributing child porn, which is what she’s doing.
1596forever: Few people are stressing this , although it is literally child pornography and you should have to do no more than threatening to call the cops on her about it to get her to delete it.
To be clear, don’t fuck up her life by having her go through being charged with all that, but even bluff if you nees to that you will to have her delete it. And lastly, masturbate away my man, dont let your parents warp your vision.
Whats more I would SERIOUSLY confront your sis as to why she did it… Shes the truly guilty one here and she doesnt realize that. Is she attracted to you? Premediated blackmail? Like what drove her to do this fucked up shit.
theDmc231: Get the cops involved. You’re a minor and she filmed you without your consent. That is child pornography. As embarrassing as it seems you have to tell your parents. If not then a counselor at school or straight to the cops.
emperorpalpatine6969: I think she wanna fuck you…
johnsgurl: I’m trying to wrap my head around this. Don’t masturbate. Don’t look at girls. Man, if he came out as gay, (not saying he is, at all, in any way. Just thinking about the enormous hypocrisy that exists here) her head would explode!! WTF! I have 4 kids. 2 grown. 2 teens. My teens are boys. I’m so excited for the day the discover sexual attraction. Then maybe getting them into a shower won’t be such a headache!
chazmann: This has to be a joke. This is the exact premise in every step sister porno I’ve ever seen.
I’d love to be of some help….but something doesn’t sit right. Especially how you describe the situation. Feels off to me.
The biggest tell was when you said that your mom won’t let you beat it.
With the internet, you know full damn well what’s up with your body, the female body and I’m sure alot of other awesome things too.
If this isn’t a joke, sorry. I’m just here to help but I can’t if you don’t level with us.
Unshavenhelga: Talk to your mom. Get the video removed. Don’t call police into this. They will destroy you whole family and leave you broke.
casino_night: I saw this exact same scenario unfold on a recent movie I saw on Pornhub. I don’t think it has the same ending you’re looking for, though.
Crashviper: I’ve seen that porno before
manofsea: Fuck her, call the police.
Karlalr: Regardless of how this ends it’s important that you understand the situation. That way you can make strong decisions for yourself in the future instead of just hating these people.
You sister is a sadist. She gets off on hurting people. What she has done is a big fucking deal. This is how she functions and she can’t help it. You cannot reason with her about this or convince her otherwise.
It’s also possible that she is really stupid, again you’re not going to be able to reason with her. This is how she functions as she doesn’t have the ability to do this differently.
Hopefully she’s a little bit of a sadist and just really dumb, but she could also just be a psychopath. Or somewhere in between. I can’t tell you which but I can tell you that you can’t reason with her.
You won’t be able to reason with your mom either, she’ll also react according to how she functions.
If you understand this then you’ll be fine in time regardless of how this ends, but the situation really sucks.
Only you can decide what to do but all solutions are messy, just remember you’ve done nothing wrong.
It’s possible that the police will treat you seriously, especially if you’re honest with them. It’s also possible they’ll only make things worse for you. Same thing with mom, you’ll have a better idea about that than I. In this situation you don’t have any obligation towards your family. You’re the victim of their actions, and actions weigh far more than kinship does. As long as you do things to protect yourself you don’t need to feel guilty. You are not responsible for anything except your own safety and well-being in this situation.
Other people will give advice on specific actions. They all have their own perspectives and I have mine. I won’t tell you how to solve this because I have no clue how this will go, but in general it’s good to trust your gut instinct. Listen to others when you think that they are right, otherwise disregard their opinions.
Best of luck, you’re worth much better than this.
Edit: You can follow the chain of authority upwards but usually not downwards. In this case your mom is lower on that chain than the police. Basically if you talk to your mom first you can still go to the police but you won’t be able to do it the other way around.
LordLongbeard: That’s child porn. She has committed a serious crime. Depending on how seriously you want to handle this, you could go to the police and she would be arrested. Frankly this is disgusting and sounds like the start of a weird incest porno.
cornylamygilbert: your stepsister is intrigued or interested over your masturbation
whatever your mom’s reason, she likely means don’t spend all your time masturbating aka going a few days without can increase your testosterone for the better
your sister might be a freak. this is highly intriguing behavior. Any woman with insight into this would be welcomed to jump in here
fatandhappydonuts: Everything your sister did is so illegal. It’s not easy to report given the messages you’ve received from your parents but it may be worth getting someone involved.
I know it’s risky but involving a trust adult at school? They may be able to advise you on the appropriate method of reporting in your city. If you’re in Ontario Canada, they legally cannot share this information with your parents because you’re over the age of 13.
theracefreak33: You’re family’s fucked up. I say call the cops because that’s a punishable crime and you family won’t give you any help.
HonoluluLion: take her phone, until she tells your mom. and then when she tells your mom she’ll have to come clean about why you took it from her
BBB232: wtf bro, your sister sounds like a cunt
JennaLS: Oh great! Suppress your child from masturbation, that won’t backfire at all! /s
Srsly tho that’s a nice starting point for some sexual predators type shit
axelcuda: Sounds like the intro to a porno
Drop_: What she did was highly illegal.
AtlanticQuake: Wtf? Not alowed to jerk off? Thats like you not alowed to have testosterone and be a human, knock some fucking common sense into your parents
Malness_86: You should whip yo dick out and jerk off during dinner in protest of this “no masturbation” policy.. It does more harm than good…
AdvocateForPotatos: If you’re not comfortable enough to tell your mom, tell a teacher, go to a guidance counselor, even a police officer if you feel comfortable with that. Will it be embarrassing? Probably. But they’ll act faster than you can imagine and will help you. Yes, they might tell your mother. But they’re easier to go to.
giggollo: Move outta there, there is at least 2 people that are stupid : your mom and your stepsister
beastly-b: i’m sorry but this is insanely weird. 1. don’t feel weird about masturbating that’s very normal and accepted. 2. wtf is wrong with your sister? why would she record that i’m so confused, do you guys have some sort of secret sexual relationship? and 3. i think that your sister having child pornography is far more extreme than you wanking it, so if your mom were to find out i hope she’d be more concerned about your sister.
dana19671969: Tell your sister you’re going to the cops and do just that, don’t say a word to your parents until after. What she’s doing is wrong. Your mother tho…that’s unbelievable she would say that.
Austish: So theres a couple of weird ideas that popped into my head while reading this, but it might help you understand more of why she did it. Not saying she has a right to any of these of course:
•She’s keeping it for blackmailing you later on
•She’s keeping it to show it around your school. to bully you because she either thinks it’s a funny joke which is extremely immature or she is trying to get back at you for pissing her off with something.
•(This one might be the most abstract one, possible but not likely) She has some weird fetish of seeing you naked, and maybe wants to have a way of seeing you naked forever. (This would be why she says she won’t delete it but she won’t show anybody anymore, if she was even telling the truth about that.)
In any case, it sounds like you’re uncomfortable with it, as most people would be. Confront her again about it and if she still refuses, go to your parents. It sounds like they’re pretty strict so I doubt they’ll let this one slide whatsoever. If neither of those work, you could always go to the police as she created child pornography by recording you jerking it. I can guarantee you if you take this route the video will be deleted and your sister will get punished for her actions. I wouldn’t take this route if you want to keep you and your sister’s relationship perfect because this will get her in a lot of trouble, which she probably won’t like at all, but at the end of the day it is YOUR body that she recorded WITHOUT your consent and you’re underage. No body has a right to do that to you. If anyone makes fun of you, bring it to the school counselor. Masturbate all you want, it’s totally normal. I had a similar situation to this in high school when me and a bunch of buddies thought it’d be hilarious to get super drunk and have sex with the women we brought to my house. None of them said yes because we were acting way out of line. So we decided to do a jerk circle together because we were all horny and only one of our phones was charged up to watch porn. Skip ahead a few years, one of the girls and two of the guys that particapted ran around school telling everyone. I didnt care because i thought it was funny as hell, made the excuse of being totally wasted, and knew in a year or two nobody would give a shit. Also couldnt bring it to the police as there was no pictures or videos taken. One dude went to the school conselor, and im not exactly sure what happened since i left for surgery for those two weeks, but when I got back, nobody talked about it. Hopefully you can get this figured out, good luck and I hoped this helped. Years down the line you’ll probably look back and laugh about how crazy this moment was.
Damn that was long.
TL;DR: Bring to your parents or cops, Tell your school conselour about it as well if people keep bullying you.
Edit: Paragraph and spacing was garbage and frustrating the hell outta me.
jst4hottstufnow: Don’t report your stepsister, but what she did is not ok and is highly illegal. She probably is unaware of this, but you should definitely make sure she realizes this is the sort of thing that could get her listed along with the people who have sex with kids and rapists and what not. For both your sakes, that tape needs to be destroyed and never ever shared. I hope you and her can figure it out, because it will be hell with your sex negative family involved and hell squared if the cops get involved. Your mutual friend is a real friend. Keep her if you can.
Mimi149: Since it sounds like you can’t tell your mom, you should tell another adult. A guidance counselor at school would be able to help you, if she is showing these videos to other students, this could be grounds for suspension. Another adult that might be able to help you are the parents of your friend that was shown the video. Have your friend discuss it with them and how it made him feel uncomfortable and see if they can help you.
NSFWhiskey: Sit your mom down and read this to her:
“Mom, you know how there are some things that socially, people consider to be wrong? Then, there are other things that are even worse – like for example, telling a lie is bad but stealing is worse right? Well, I’m sorry but I masturbate. I know you told me it’s gross but it’s something that’s natural whether you agree or not.
But, hold on to that for a second – you know what happened? I found out through a friend at school that my step sister RECORDED me masturbating, and she’s showing it to people at school.
I have been trying my best for you to not find out that I masturbate, like probably every guy my age does with their parents, but now she won’t delete the video even though I’ve asked her to, and I’m afraid of what she’s going to do with the video.
I’m underage and I’m pretty sure that what she has would be considered child porn.
I’m really embarrassed to talk to you about this, but I had to. You are my mother and regardless of what you think about me masturbating, I think it’s your job to protect me from stuff like this, so…what are you going to do about it?
I would rather you help me, ‘cus I’m thinking about talking to the police if that’s what it takes. She can possibly try to bribe me with the video and thinks that I’m going to do anything she wants ‘cus she is banking on the idea that I won’t have the balls to talk to you about this.”
Trust me kid, if you say the above to your mom, as embarrassing as it would be, it’s better than not saying anything and waiting until your step sister decides to bribe you into doing something really bad. She thinks you won’t mention this to your mom, and is trying to play you. It’s up to you if she wins on this or doesn’t. I think if you get your mom involved, things will backfire on that cunt.
nickros182: This sounds like a plot to a porn.
CloddishNeedlefish: I’m pretty sure that filming and distributing child pornography is a felony. I’d be reporting it to the police right away.
There’s zero reason to protect her. Who knows what other horrible things she’s doing or capable of doing.
zreichez: Go straight to the police for her invasion of privacy and child porn.
npepin: I don’t think that this a problem that r/sex can solve.
BeautifulRebellion: Call the cops
RedeRules770: Call the police and let her face real consequences for her actions
ahoydeltaco: Fuck her. Literally.
Sfgiants420: Get a video of your step farther masturbating, show it to both of them and problem solved…lol
fupalupas1: White people wildin
shagballs: Fuck your sister while she sleeps and make a video out of it
JMHorsemanship: 16 year olds are so confusing. If I had a 17 year old step sister that I lived with that took a video of me masturbating and used it to masturbate herself id be all over that
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