How to relax before sex?
I love sex, don’t get me wrong, but my anxiety and nerves make it awkward and not as fun. After we start getting into it, I don’t worry anymore, but I would like to know how to just keep myself calm so that I can not tense up and choke when performing oral, that’s super embarrassing.
JabberwockyJurist: Sometimes if I’m feeling particularly stressed and having problems relaxing, I ask for a body rub. Top of my head to the tip of my toes. It helps me refocus and get into the moment. Touch is very effective for me.
sexualbonds: Fellow anxiety person, usually I ask for a massage, or to get relaxed and more comfortable I ask my husband to take it slow. Slow as if I was a virgin basically.
sexualbonds: I prefer hard sex as well but sometimes when my anxiety flares going slow steadies me.
leeeyuhh: I guess what I’m trying to ask is how to not be nervous during oral. Because I’m sex-hungry so I won’t even think about that, it’s just when I go down on them my mind is free to create worry and anxiety, and it messes me up.
leeeyuhh: yeah It’s gotten much worse since I stopped using drugs because before I would have something in my system all the time, then I’d take more to ease anxiety before sex , and then I’d fuck them, usually to get MORE drugs, it was kind of a repetitive cycle but my point is that since i’ve been clean I think i freak out more in comparison.
Coidzor: Well, why are you anxious about having sex in the first place?
Do you have a regular sexual partner?