I’m (32M) just getting into sex and looking for casual sex, but all the women I’ve met want relationships.
I’m a 32 year old guy who only recently (within the last year) lost his virginity. I’ve been working out and look better than ever, I have my own place in a big city, and I’ve got a pretty high paying career. I finally decided that I need to pursue sex and make up for all the lost time so I’ve made dating profiles and started going out more to different clubs and meetups, looking only for casual stuff.
However, it seems as though everyone around me, man and women, are at a completely different stage of their lives. The women I’ve met and had interest in, both in real life and through Tinder or Okcupid, are looking for a steady relationship, and there’s nothing wrong with that but it’s completely the opposite of what I’m looking for. I don’t really want to settle down because I feel like I’ve been settling down for the past 32 years. I’ve been told (mostly by guy friends so this may have a bias) that the women I’m pursuing are looking for marriage in at least the next few years and kids soon after that (if they want them of course). And by “women I’m pursuing” I mean other 30-something year olds with careers and what not.
I could try adjusting my age range and I would have no problem with that, but I’ve always been told, by Reddit and my friends, that an older guy going for younger women was creepy because it seems like he is aiming low because he is too immature for women his age, which I guess is true for my case. Also, I’d rather not aim too low, like 20-22, just because of how different it seems I am to women these ages, however even with women 25 and up its mostly been relationship focused.
Is it even a good thing to have that feeling of making up for lost time? Should I just abandon that and try for a relationship? I just know that I’ll be insecure in a relationship because of how late I’ve started and how my partner will have all these experiences and I won’t. I want to go through those wild early twenties years, but obviously the problem is that I’m not in my early twenties.
TLDR – I am a late-to-the-game early thirties guy that can’t seem to find women interested in casual stuff.