I’ve fallen for “clop” (MLP porn)… What went wrong in my brain? Should I stop or just give in? How bad can this hurt me?
A few years ago I was working at a Walmart in the photo center near where Brony Convention takes place. Each year they’d print out all sorts of stuff to sell at their convention, a lot of it suggestive and sometimes full on pornographic Ponies.
It disturbed me to no end that I actually thought some of it was pretty hot, so I didn’t bother looking into it. Didn’t want to delve into that one.
Fast forward to about a month ago and an askreddit thread popped up that I finally had an interesting story for. I got to talk about all the pony porn I had to sort at Walmart. Unfortunately this led to my curiosity getting the better of me, and I ended up doing some googlin… which lead to saving a few.
It started off relatively tame (Not porn but suggestive).
But I kept going. I wanted MORE and regular porn just seemed so boring in comparison.
So here I am now, a full blown “clopper” and it’s driving me nuts. I was always pretty sexually normal, but this feels like I’ve both hit a gold mine (I freakin love it and there is SO MUCH to look at, literally hundreds of thousands of really good drawings) and sunk my mental ship at the same time (Oh god what have I triggered).
I’m honestly afraid of where this will lead. I’m definitely not into regular real life horses, but I didn’t think I’d like cartoon versions with anatomically correct genitalia either. It’s just so much more exciting than regular porn. Maybe I’m just burnt out on pornhub junk? Or is this some kind of deep-seated thing from my childhood that I’ve just now discovered?
I know this sounds completely ridiculous but I genuinely don’t know where else to ask something like this. Should I cut myself off completely before it does some kind of permanent mental/sexual damage? Or just give in and explore it? Honestly It might be painful not to at this point since I really like it so much.
venus_in_furs444: I think you are worrying too much. Give in and let yourself look. Be kind to yourself! We all have our weird things we’re into. The point when it becomes problematic is when you start to involve people that don’t fully consent, but that doesn’t seem to be an issue here.
flightlessbirdbrain: I’ve never been to a Brony convention or the like, but my daughter watches MLP whenever she can and, consequently, I wind up watching it too. It feels weird thinking this, and even stranger writing it down, but … it’s occurred to me more than once that Rarity has a pretty nice ass for a unicorn.
I wouldn’t beat yourself up over it. There are people who get turned on by popping balloons, or pooping in adult diapers. Relatively speaking, I feel like this is ‘normal’.
nosaure: If you hurt no one, if you respect consent, then nothing’s inherently wrong. But maybe it makes you suffer. Most probably, it’s socially induced shame, because it is seen as deviant or what. In which case, learn not to care about it and enjoy your life.
If you feel there’s something else that makes you suffer, then maybe investigate a little bit more. But keep in mind that I can still be social pressure in disguise (like the hidden childhood trauma BS of psychoanalysis)
SableSword: Its porn, no one is getting hurt by you looking at it. You do you.
distractasoldier: Like others have said, you shouldn’t feel ashamed as long as it’s not hurtful.
But if you still want to get over this, maybe cut back on porn a bit, it might be because like you said you’re desensitized (your brain needs “more/harder/different” porn).
Also worth noting but my personal tastes in porn have changed pretty often. For a month or two I’d be really into one kind of porn then just find something else. So maybe you’ll just find something else in a bit.
Wizardsmoke: If it’s bothering you stop looking at it and masturbate with no porn.