Me: Will there be fisting involved?
Girl: Only if you bring lubriderm
We’ve all seen that gorgeous girl in the coffee shop, that stunning woman in the shopping mall, that breathtaking young girl in the cocktail bar — and perhaps thought “if I just had the right thing to say!”
Maybe you go home kicking yourself for not trying, or maybe you’ve just given up on this sort of thing, deciding that “only rich, good looking guys have a chance with her”, or worse “that kind of stuff doesn’t happen in real life”.
But still, maybe if you just had the perfect line, she’d be yours.
The truth is, all of these mindsets are completely wrong. Yes, this kind of thing does happen. No it doesn’t only happen to good looking, rich guys — and perhaps most surprisingly, exactly what you say doesn’t matter all that much.
Take the exchange at the top of the article (yes, I really said that to a girl).
Why didn’t I get slapped? Why didn’t she tell all her friends I was a creepy weirdo? Why did she give me her number within 5 minutes of meeting me?
I’m sure you’ve seen or experienced something like this before, where some guys seem to be able to “get away with” anything.
This is the key — to be that guy. Anyone can come up with a clever pickup line. Very few people can say whatever they want and still get a girl into bed.
Starting a Conversation with a Girl
Here is a good opener during the day: “excuse me, I thought you were really cute and I had to come meet you”
Here is a good opener at bars/parties: “hi, I’m Matt”
I’ve picked up models with both these lines. So problem solved, right?
Hopefully you can see by now that simply having the right line isn’t going to make girls jump into bed with you. If you’re thinking “well, that wouldn’t work for me”, well, you’re probably right. If you’re thinking “well what do I say next?”, then you still haven’t got it yet.
Get Out of Your Own Way
Think back to the two lines at the top. Why can I “get away with” something like that, but you most likely can’t?
The answer is that your beliefs about sex, women, dating and yourself are holding you back. They come across in the way you act, the way you carry yourself, the way you talk, the way you make eye contact and the things that pop into your head — and they are nearly impossible to hide.
Do you believe with 100% conviction that women love sex and most will have sex on the first night they meet you or on the first date? Do you believe with 100% conviction that you’re the kind of guy that will bring that out in them?
My guess is you don’t. In fact, you may be questioning whether those things are true at all.
Truth be told, it’s a self-fullfilling prophecy. Here’s an example from last week to highlight this.
How to Lead it From Meeting to Sex
Last Thursday I started a conversation with a very attractive girl at a local bar. About 5 minutes in she got dragged away by her friends, as attractive girls often do, and we had to swap numbers at meet later.
On Sunday we met for a drink at a restaurant bar near my place. As it turns out, she’s also very smart, composed and quietly confident — the type most guys would label as a “quality” girl, who might need to be taken on expensive dates or “probably wouldn’t have sex outside of a relationship”.
Nevertheless, after a drink of too, I suggested we stop by my place to see my Foam Roller (if you can think of a lamer excuse to pull a girl home, please let me know), and we head back.
Long story short, 15 minutes later her legs are up over my shoulders with her boots still on her feet.
Becoming “That Guy”
The moral of the story here is that if you actually believe 100% that you deserve hot girls, that hot girls will want to meet you and have sex with you, and that this is all normal to you, it will ooze out through every aspect of your being — and hot girls will instantly pick up on that.
And when you believe that with complete conviction, everything you say will automatically be the right thing.
So whether you’re talking about fisting and Lubriderm, or the weather, the girl will be attracted.
As with most things, the truth is generally simple but never easy. You can’t just snap your fingers and become the guy who knows without a shadow of a doubt that he’s attractive to women, and acts accordingly.
But you can certainly get there.
Start by approaching girls with the lines given earlier in the article, and come to terms with the fact that you’re not going to fuck every hot girl you talk to starting on day one. It’s okay. Any change worth making takes time — and no pickup line will instantly fix that for you.
Go out there, give it a shot and try to hold those beliefs in your mind. They’re true to the extent that you think they are.