Has the modern mating game been making you weary? Are you tired of dealing with one flighty, stuck-up, flaky girl after another who wouldn’t know a strong man if he bit her on the neck?
Well then my friend, the MILF is the answer for you. You’re not going to deal with any of the nonsense that you find with younger girls when you learn how to start seducing their older counterparts. What’s so great about MILFs?
Find and Pick Up MILFs
They are more sophisticated. Even if a MILF is not the smartest person you have ever encountered, she will at the very least have more knowledge of the world than younger women. There is something to be said about a woman who has done some traveling (usually), changed career paths, experienced pain with family and friendships, and has come to understand the true nature of the world.
They are realists. The fact is that MILFs do not look at the world through rose colored glasses. They don’t have time to play games because they know how the world really is. They know that they are past their prime and will no longer have droves and droves of men chasing after them. They know that they have to worry about bills and putting food on the table and retirement. So they simply don’t have time to be playing around on their smartphones stringing guys along for their own entertainment. They just want a quality lover who will be on the same page.
They have emotional maturity. Most young girls will drive you crazy with how, well… crazy they can be. Never sure of what they want, how to communicate, or what direction they want to take their lives, young girls are always inviting drama into your life. On the other hand, older women are very clear and unapologetic with their desires and know how to communicate their emotional needs to men.
So how do you go about seducing MILFs? Let’s talk how:
QUICK REFERENCE: COUGARS
Before we dive into the nitty-gritty on MILFs, for the sake of completeness, let me list out for you my three separate, but related, previous articles on that other svelte older lady: the cougar.
The 7 Greatest Things About Cougars
How to Have Sex with a Cougar
The 6 Rules of Cougar Dating (You Must Follow These!)
Now onto the main event.
#1:GET READY FOR DAY GAME
It’s going to be pretty difficult to seduce a MILF if you don’t know where to find them. So, learning about the locations they frequent will be an important step in eventually picking them up.
First key tip: If you want to successfully pick up a MILF, you have to do it during the day. It’s not that MILFs don’t go out at night, it’s just that the ones who do are more looking for the validation of men hitting on them or even for a man of conspicuous consumption to take them home, rather than necessarily finding a young buck to shack up with for the night. These night MILFs tend to be the more unstable ones looking to relive the excitement and chaos of their younger years.
Why don’t you usually find the quality MILFs at night? Well, either
They avoid the bar/club scene,
They are at home… caring for their children.
So if you are not comfortable with day game and you want to pick up MILFs, then you better start sharpening that daytime axe.
#2: KNOW WHERE TO FIND A MILF
Since we know that MILFs are daytime people, let’s talk about where to find them:
In a middle/upper-class residential neighborhood. I can’t tell you how many times I walked through a residential neighborhood in the middle of the daytime and seen MILFs jogging, walking their dogs, taking an afternoon stroll with their MILF friends, or even pushing a stroller with their children. It is easy to approach them by stopping them to ask for directions to the nearest healthy restaurant or grocery store. And then to continue the interaction by saying something like: “Thank you so much. I figured you to be the right person to ask since you look like you stay in shape. You must around 25 or something, right?”
In a neighborhood park. You can often find MILFs in neighborhood parks either looking after their children or hanging out with their friends who have young children who aren’t of school age. It’s vital here not to be a creeper. Start addressing her first. You can talk about how her child “has her mother’s beautiful eyes” or how you love kids because you’re a teacher/mentor/single dad or any other profession that deals with kids (bonus points to you in the MILF’s mind if you actually are one of these things). Once you get the seal of approval, you can start moving into light banter.
Health Food Stores. Really bomb MILFs are very conscientious about what they put in their bodies – and even more so about what they put in their children’s bodies. So any health food store (Whole Foods, Trader Joe’s, or local organic stores) or even farmer’s market will be a great place to meet a MILF.
One of my favorite health food store lines is: “Excuse me, this may sound foolish, but I am pretty new to using chard (or any other super healthy food), and I was wondering if you have any recommendations on good things I can do with this.” And if she is a normal human being, then she will try to recommend some sort of recipe and tell you about how she uses it. And after she does this, you can say: “That’s so great! Looks like now I’ll be able to cook you a nice dinner.” This line gets women of all ages – but it’s particularly effective with the MILF. And in the case that she does not use the healthy food, you can say: “Well that’s too bad. And here I wanted to cook you a nice healthy meal, but it just looks like we’ll remain two clueless strangers.”
And in either case, she will laugh, and you will laugh, and then you can grab her name and engage in a little idle chat. And when you are done, in Scenario A you can say: “Well Lucy, in all seriousness, it seems like you really know what you are doing, so if you are up for it, I would love to get a cooking lesson.” Or in Scenario B: “Well Lucy, we really cannot let this happen again; looks like we both need to expand our cooking horizons. How would you feel about getting together and making a superstar tandem meal?”
Higher End Malls. MILFs love shopping for themselves or their children. So whether your excuse is that you’re looking for something for your niece or nephew in a baby or children’s clothing store, or if it is wanting to find a new dress shirt for your sister’s birthday dinner, find a way to get her opinion on what you are doing.
#3:USE STRONG BODY LANGUAGE
When you’re approaching an attractive MILF, know that it’s not her first rodeo; it’s probably not even her hundredth rodeo, for that matter. So you need to come off as confident and assured when you approach her.
Maintain strong eye contact
Stand up straight and take up a lot of space
Pepper in physicality as appropriate (she’s still a woman)
#4:ENGAGE HER IN STIMULATING CONVERSATION
When you are with a MILF, it is important to build rapport and a connection by discussing things that she (and most older women) are passionate about. She doesn’t just want to talk about what the Kardashians are doing. She wants to discuss books, documentaries, spirituality, cultural events, social issues, and other topics of actual substance.
A friend of mine was telling me a story about how he was talking to one of his older colleagues about her love life. His colleague is an attractive, well accomplished woman. And she had something very interesting (and shockingly open) to say that really stuck in my brain. She said, “As an older woman, if you want to have a chance with me, first you have to fuck my mind, then you can fuck my body.”
So you may very well need to stimulate a MILF intellectually as well as sexually. She doesn’t want only a good lover, but also someone who talks with her about her favorite subjects too.
#5:KNOW THAT SHE’S LOOKING FOR YOU
In the same way that you’re fantasizing about an older woman releasing all of her pent up passion, experience, and energy on you, she’s wishing the same thing on her end. There is nothing that gets a MILF going more than the idea of being with a younger man.
Find and Pick Up MILFs
If she’s more of the commanding type, then she’ll be fantasizing about making you her student and teaching you about how to pleasure her in all of the right ways. If she is the more submissive type, then she’ll be fantasizing about you dominating her and telling her what to do.
Strangely enough, the stronger the woman on the outside, the more she tends to want to be dominated on the inside. This is because strong women are used to being the boss in every sphere of their life, but sometimes they don’t want to be the boss. Sometimes they do not want to be the equal. Sometimes they want to be the slutty servant who is reminded by the man who is in control. These types of fantasies not only take them back to the younger days, but make them feel like true, sexually liberated women – which she can’t feel like in most situations in her day-to-day life.
So go in with the mindset that she’s not only fulfilling a fantasy of yours, but also that you are fulfilling a fantasy of hers.
#6:LISTEN TO HER TALK ABOUT HER KIDS
It doesn’t matter if the father of her children is as good a man as the Dalai Lama or an asshole scumbag who she never wants to see again, all women in their right mind will still deeply love their children, no matter what. They always hold their children in loving regard no matter how messed up the situation with the father is.
And this means that you have to be prepared to listen to her talk about her kids. It’s a very common misconception among men that MILFs don’t want to talk about their children. This notion is incredibly false. MILFs love talking about their children.
They always talk about how proud they are of their children, and will want to share those moments of pride with you – even if you’re a younger guy. And don’t be surprised if she even busts out a picture or two as well. So you must be ready to listen and show a caring regard and appreciation for the fact that she is a mother. And you must make sure to never insult her children, disregard their importance, or ever imply that you should be a greater priority.
This is really, really important, and a lesson that I and many of my associates have learned the hard way. This in no way means that you have to be around her kids – you should in fact avoid this scenario at all costs – but you should acknowledge them and be ready to hear all about them, especially if she has young kids.
Don’t trip yourself up in the process of getting a MILF by being blindsided by kid talk.
#7:TURN UP THE SEXUALITY
Just as with any woman, if you want to pick up a MILF, you have to eventually turn on the sexuality. With MILFs, it is especially important that you don’t just pepper them with sexual comments/touch/intentions (unless it’s really on).
You’ll want to make subtle comments about how she’s a beautiful woman with a really toned stomach, or look deeply into her eyes and get a devious smile on your face, and then when she asks what’s up, just say in a sultry voice “you have really pretty eyes.” Then defuse the situation by going back to regular conversation.
And when you compliment her, make sure it’s a genuine and unique compliment. A MILF is a woman in her mid-30’s, and, if she’s attractive, she’s heard generic compliments her entire life.
So if you want to get past her defenses and make her feel like your desire is genuine, then you have to deliver a genuine and unique compliment. Sometimes I’ll try to compliment a MILF on something that no one has ever complimented her on before. I’ll want them to say “No one has ever complimented me on my legs before… I think they’re kind of stubby.” And I’ll say “Well I guess I’ll be the first, because I find them to be very nice.”
So flattery can definitely be a great tool as you turn up the sexuality with a MILF, but just make sure it’s genuine, on the more subtle side, and that you prevent the tension from spiking too quickly or becoming uncomfortable by going back to normal topics.
#8:DEFLECT HER AGE OBJECTIONS
If you’re making headway in seducing a MILF, then you will inevitably hit a wall of her objections about both her age and her being a mother. These will be statements such as:
“I’m old enough to be your mother!”
“Don’t you think you should be dating girls your own age?”
“No younger man wants to date an old lady like me… especially when she has a kid!”
But you must ignore and power through all of these objections. She has just been conditioned by society to hide her desire for younger men and to feel guilty and/or embarrassed to immediately entertain the thought of seeing you. And add on the fact that she’s a woman and she has the reputation of maturity to maintain in front of all of her friends… and you can more clearly understand why she can’t just say, “Yes! Even though you’re a decade or two younger than I am, I’m really attracted to you and definitely want to go on a date!”
So even though a MILFs resistance will be a bit stronger than normal token resistance, it is still only token resistance.
So you can respond with statements like:
“I know you’re supposed to say that, but I still find you incredibly attractive, and there’s nothing you can do about that.”
“I find girls my age to be rather immature, and I’m looking for someone who can keep me stimulated. And you’ve definitely been intriguing me this whole time.”
“Actually, I think you may be a little too young for me. I usually go for women at least twice your age.”
#9: INVITE HER OUT
Find and Pick Up MILFs
If you’ve done all of the approaching process correctly, then all you have to do is invite the MILF out. MILFs like doing things like drinking fine wine (if something artistic is involved, all the better), being out in nature, or cooking meals.
The date doesn’t have to be anything incredibly complex. So follow normal date protocol, and then invite her back to your place or find out if her child is home.
You do not want to be going back to her spot if her child is there. So find that out; but in general, it’s best to have the control of the environment – so invite her back to your place… and enjoy.
NOTE: THE MARRIED MILF
An important question that might be on your mind is: how do I find out if she’s married? This is a fantastic question.
If you want to find out if a MILF is married, you can use one of two strategies that I love:
When complimenting her about her cute kids or about how beautiful/social/knowledgeable she is, say “Your husband must be a very lucky man.” This is an innocuous statement that will tell you everything you need to know. If she agrees with you, then kindly draw the interaction to a close with a “nice meeting you.” If she says “Actually… ” followed by the explanation, you know that you’ll have an in.
Ask for her hand (or just pick it up demurely). Personally, I love this method. I’ll just pick up a woman’s hand (or ask for it if I get the rare sheepishness), and look at her ring finger. If she has a ring, I’ll shake my head shamefully and say “You really shouldn’t be flirting with me.” If she doesn’t have one, I’ll nod and say “Just checking” and give her a sexy smile.
I know a few men who have dabbled in the arts of seducing married MILFs, but I personally don’t mess around with women who are spoken for in any capacity. But to each his own.
However, if this is something you’re interested in – or maybe a married woman has showed interest in you – then you have to have Herculean amounts of discretion. You have to see her and talk to her on her own terms, and you have to understand her life situation.
You definitely want to meet up at your place/neutral locations as much as possible. And you definitely also want to have as much distance and ignorance about her life as you can.
But if dabbling in the married-MILF-looking-for-a-sexual-escape game is your thing, I know a couple of men who use ashleymadison.com to connect with MILFs looking to bring some spice and desire back into their lives.
The MILF is definitely one of the most coveted categories of women among men – and for good reason. There is something to be said about a woman who has done some traveling, changed career paths, experienced pain with family and friendships, and has come to understand the true nature of the world.
Younger women can really drive you crazy sometimes: never sure what they want, how to communicate, or what direction they want to take their lives. So sometimes it can be great to be with women like MILFs with whom things can be so much clearer and drama-free.
If you’ve been ever dreamed about being with a MILF, dream no more – because dreams really do come true. And, hopefully, so will she.